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We’ve experienced a big change in our family in the last week. After a lot of struggles, searching and praying, our youngest was accepted into a program, and has spent the last week adjusting to his new environment. He is likely to be in the program for a year, and so we, too, are adjusting to our environment which for now, doesn’t include him. (I first wrote about this over here.)

 

Sharing this is important because it’s part of my reality as a mother. Some parts of this journey are really awesome and I love to share them, other parts are not so awesome but to not share them wouldn’t be authentic. 

 

I’ve been surprised by the many feelings that have surfaced in the past week. It’s been really, really hard with this child of ours for many, many months (honestly...for years). And the truth is, I teared up when I realized he had been accepted, not from sadness, but from relief; I knew we were finally going to receive a new level of help for him … and for us.

 

Although I understood the gravity of our decision, I was surprised by the heaviness on my spirit. Tears intertwined with peace, the desire for control mingled with the relief of letting go and confidence wedged itself next to doubt. 

 

Most families will never find themselves in a situation like this, but some do. Of those, many have a hard time sharing what they are walking through — it can be rather intimidating to be real about your hard stuff when the norm is to share your shiny and bright moments. I wanted to open up about this because sometimes our hard stuff encourages someone else. I wanted the opportunity to tell you if you’re walking a tough road, you’re not alone. I wanted to be honest with you — this former National Young Mother of the Year doesn’t have a perfect family … but then do any of us?

10 Comments

Wow Sheri -- please know that you are still an amazing mother, and more so because you recognize when it's time to get help. Thanks for being honest with us all and respecting us enough to open your soul.

Thank you, Bonnie.

My heart breaks for you, your family and the agonizing decisions you've had to make. You are doing what is right for your family and no one could or should ever question your actions. Know that I am thinking of you and your family and hope that this transition is smooth. I also hope that your son gets the help he needs and that your family unit can soon come together again!

Krisco4,

Thanks for your words on this subject. Our transition has gotten smoother, even over this last week. It's more calm and peaceful in our home, and I know he is where he is supposed to be for right now. We've been in contact through the counselor, reports and even an email from or son. Thanks for caring and speaking such words of encouragement and support. :)

Sheri

Sheri,
You truly have come to mind often since I read your post. Each time I lift you and your family up in prayer. I'm so glad to hear that things have gone a bit smoother and pray that it only gets better. Know that you are being thought of!

Praying for your family.

Thank you again for your kind and uplifting thoughts. Though we've not met, I definitely am sensing a community here at Moms.FortWayne.com. :)

Thank you for sharing your story. I think each family goes through some trials and sometimes the road is easy and sometimes it is not. The journey is a process and I personally know it takes time to get through some things.

Sheri, I know I am really late responding to your blog post. I apologize. I am wondering how your son is doing now that he has been a while in the program. I have been praying about it; and believe me when I say, I understand your pain. I am not referring to Kalisha but to another child (adult) of mine and a grandchild. It hurts, but we must do some hard things sometimes. God bless.

Thank you, Gloria. I recently wrote an update here, titled Do you miss him? I do very much appreciate your prayers, thoughts and words.